Warning: This is more of a rambling of thoughts that I've had, and yes some things relate to SL, others not so much..
So, I sit here, on my computer with the understanding that we have about a month left this semester. And I thought about how when I first came into this class how excited I was. How I wanted to be in here, 1) Because people I knew just raved about SL and I had yet to be given an excuse to download it 2) I have had various expierences with virtual worlds, and was very interested in what made this one different. I came in to this class, not only wanting to widen my horizons, meet people from various degree backgrounds, but also have the ability to express myself.
And unfortunately I found myself in a very difficult place. Now understand, I still classify myself as being a young individual. And I think most would agree. I look around the room, and most of the people I sit with are not freshman in college. Even though people here are considered my peers, I do not feel like I am their peer intellectually. And many times this has stopped me from commenting in the class during discussion, and many times from posting or commenting on the blog as well.
And I regret that. I regret not taking the opportunity to step up and converse with those around me.
After such thoughts, I actually began to think about my interaction within SL. In terms of interacting with those that I might see in class, well, it seems as if I tried to avoid such things. As to other places in SL, I find it easy to start up a conversation with random people I meet, and I seem to have no problem with leading a conversation. And in real life, in any circumstance but our classroom, I seem to have no problems doing either of these things!
It just seems as for sharing, talking, and communicating within the class and on the blog, well I think feeling meek and shy may be an understatement.
And maybe all this has something to do with not really knowing as much as those around me. Or at least me feeling as if I don't know as much. Or maybe that sometimes I think that I really don't have much to say that would add value to the conversation.
I check the blog on a regular basis, and I think well, it would be nice just to post, post about thoughts, random as they be, some dealing with SL, others about news in technology and the world.
Hmmm. Well. I think that is enough rambling for now.
Hopefully later I'll get to post my machinama!!
1 comment:
There have been a lot of times this semester that I have felt the same way as you. This is the first discussion-type class I've taken in a few years - it's been mostly lecture-type engineering classes. I think a lot of it has to do with comfort level. I don't speak up much in class, usually because I also feel that I don't have much to say that would add to the discussion. It may also be due to my fear of saying dumb things in front of people I don't really know that well. Sometimes I hear someone in class make a comment, and I have a response but I think "is my comment as insightful, or does it even make sense," then by the time I come to a decision the class has already moved on.
That's why I think this blog is a fairly nifty idea. I have time to ponder my response and word it they way I want. It doesn't put me on the spot like class discussion does (part of that comfort level thing).
My biggest hurdle is trying to get over my fears. This class, blog, and VE interaction are helping but I think I still have some ways to go.
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